Body image advice from the stars.

I was watching Maxim's Hot 100 on VH1 last night (I know, I know, why torture myself, right? I'm a glutton for punishment.). I was watching the countdown of the hottest 100 women in the world according to Maxim's experts (and by experts I mean self-important egotistical shmuck editors).

Anyway, Eva Mendez was on talking about a photoshoot she did for Maxim where where wore only a very adorable pair of boots. I was only half listening to her because I was preoccupied with pulling excess fur off of the cat before it ended up on the couch. And then I heard, "Blah blah blah, once you let go of looking perfect, blah blah blah, it's like a weight is lifted off your shoulders. Blah blah blah, more confidence, blah blah blah."

And I thought to myself, "Shut up, Eva Mendez. Of course you can say that. Saying that doesn't mean much coming from someone who is.... wait for it.... PERFECT looking. In every way. No really. Even the slight overbite is cute."

Moral of that story, I can't listen to body image advice from perfect people. They haven't a clue.

The one thing, though, that I try to remember when I'm wondering why he doesn't seem to notice the cellulite, or the deflated boobs, or the tree-trunk thighs is this: people don't see us standing perfectly still in front of them. They see us in movement. They see us walking, running, talking, laughing, playing. They don't see a statue, they see movement. And a lot of that is missed in movement. They see us as we relate to the world around us. That, at the very least, is partially comforting.

Long time, no blog

I don't know why I'm compelled to update, but I do. I did, after all, go through the trouble to start this thing in the first place.

I should update, maybe? Just... in general, yes?

I'm becoming increasingly disgruntled with work. I regularly want to punch everyone's lights out. We have a new part-timer who is sweet. She really is, she's wonderful. But she and my other officemate chatter incessantly. I was so annoyed yesterday that I put my headphones on and turned them all the way up because I just could not bear the sound of their voices anymore.

Also, my officemate, whom I feel badly speaking negatively about, has really started to make me angry. The other day I heard her telling someone, "Oh, I'll have Heather do such and such." I said, "You'll have me do something? Or you'll ask me to do something?" She looked embarrassed. And she should have been. I hate to act five, but she is not the boss of me. I don't work for her, she isn't my supervisor, and she won't have me do anything. If anything, I'm the one with seniority, but I won't pull that card.

But then I did put some things aside that could wait, and I helped her, and she blathered on with our part-time lady forEVER. She was not working for at least 45 minutes. So I packed up the unfinished work, put it back on her desk, and did my own thing. I won't be taken advantage of at work.

As far as NOTwork goes, I'm still sort of... feh. I'm still unable to really be affectionate, I'm still feeling betrayed and upset, and my self-esteem is still in the shitter. I want to just get over it already. Or I wish I'd never found out in the first place...