I was listening to the radio in the car on the way home the other day (which is weird because I almost never do this because 97% of what is played on the radio is horrible, ear-piercing crap. But I needed to hear the traffic, so what are you gonna do, eh?), and I heard a commercial for a local tanning salon.
It went something like: "Give someone special the perfect stocking stuffer this year! Give them a gift card to Get-Orange-Real-Fast Tan!"
PERFECT! Just what I always wanted! Cancer! How did you know that I wanted cancer for Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Festivus?! It's perfect! Thank you!
I mean, really.
Since when did peeling skin, wrinkles, age spots, a distinctly fake even color, and cancer become a great gift?
I work with a girl who tans. I told her I'm too freaked out about the health implications to tan anymore. She said, "Well, we're all going to die some day, I want to go with a tan."
I really hate this smartass comment when I tell people that I don't tan because my grandfather died of melanoma. And I'm mole-y, like him. And my dad has had some suspect moles removed, too.
So I shot back, "Yeah, well. My grandfather died of melanoma. It's a pretty fucking miserable way to go. It's painful, and really, not a lot of fun. I'd like to be around for my daughter as long as possible. Besides, I don't want to look like I'm 40 when I'm 30 like the rest of the obsessive tanners I know."
Boo.fucking.yah.
Wear your sunscreen, people, because cancer is NOT sexy.
5 comments:
So what you're saying is that you'd like me to send you a gift certificate for tanning this holiday season?
Or maybe one for Botox?
Or a hose with which you can suck up your nose all the household cleaners in your cabinets?
I agree. People are sooooo dumb--cavalier even--when it comes to their health.
Good Lord. I mean...GOOD LORD.
Yeah, I get tired of people making fun of my "fishbelly white" skin. So I should go tan? When my white skin, freckles, and green eyes mean that I'm more likely to get skin cancer? That seems SMRT.
I've gotten annoyed at the "Tanfastic" ads here, too. I feel your pain.
;o)
I grew up in NZ, aka the Land Without An Ozone Layer. I remember getting sunburnt at 7 am one summer - that's how nasty the sun can get down there. And something like 1 in 4 adults develop melanoma before they hit forty. No, thank you - I'll stay blue-veined pasty, if you don't mind.
Of course, this meant that my American MIL got a hurt look on her face when she wanted to take me tanning with her as a bonding experience, and I recoiled in horror at the thought... Whoops.
From one lilly white chick to another I just have to say YES! Pro Sunscreen All The Way!
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